


Cas' Verbal Filter Has Not Gotten Better

by Skunky



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Almost everyone is Alive!, Fluff, Lilith is not a threat, Men of Letters Bunker, Only rated Teen and Up for like two curse words., Soup is Good for Your Soul
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-29
Updated: 2015-08-29
Packaged: 2018-04-17 23:08:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4684700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skunky/pseuds/Skunky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Pam?" Well, Dean certainly wasn't expecting to see HER when he opened the bunker's door. Honestly though, he should start to expect this sort of thing after becoming poker night buddies with Crowley and getting the regular news report about Lilith, having been reborn as a normal criminal, robbing convenient stores. So really, why is he surprised?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cas' Verbal Filter Has Not Gotten Better

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! So my friend I were claiming characters and this happened. Basically we each have to write one Sastiel fic (for me) and one Destiel fic (for her) using ONLY the characters we claimed plus the main three and ALL the characters we claimed. 
> 
> Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine and this is my first time writing something other than a school essay so go easy on me. Thank you and enjoy!

"Pam?" Well, Dean certainly wasn't expecting to see HER when he opened the bunker's door. Honestly though, he should start to expect this sort of thing after becoming poker night buddies with Crowley and getting the regular news report about Lilith, having been reborn as a normal criminal, robbing convenient stores. So really, why is he surprised?

"Yes, what other psychic do you know Dean?" asked Pamela, rather impatiently.

"Well-" Dean started before he was rudely interrupted, "There's me! Hi, Andrew Gallagher, nice to meet you, technically not a psychic more..." he waived his hands as though willing the answer to appear "mind control-y and telepathic, but just call me-" "Andy, I know," cut in Pamela "but-" "Dean, I'm not really a psychic either, I'm a prophet. Hello Pamela, nice to see you're doing well, I'm Chuck... um, Shurley, Chuck Shurley."

'Why did I invite all these guys to live here?' Dean thought to himself 'It would have been bad enough just living with all the-' "YES! FINALLY!" exclaimed Pam, "I'm here to speak to that pretty boy angel you've got runnin' around here."

It was then that Sam decided to make an appearance at the door.

"Dammit, why is everyone reading my mind today?!?" huffed Dean who was so done with mind reading and future seeing friends.

"Did someone ask for little ol' me?" entered Balthazar

"No, the other pretty boy angel."

"Did you mean me?" asked Samandriel who had also joined the Mötley Crüe at the very crowded front door.

Dean thought they'd be here all day if he didn't give his input, "Pam you're gonna have to be more specific, we've got about five pretty boy angels here." To which Sam could recognize only one which deserved that or a better title, more like he had a crush on, but he's a grown man so, no.

"Well are you at least going to invite me in? Or is the whole house gonna have a nice kumbaya at the front door?"

"I'm up for it!" said Ash with a raised hand and a look that told all those present that he was completely serious and ready to bring firewood to the doormat himself. "We'd just have to get the other half of the house over here." suggested Jo having previously been with her adopted brother, Ash, playing ping-pong after Dean made good on Sam's bet that he would get one soon enough.

And, Sam's heard enough, "OKAY, everybody inside!" With enough pushing and awkward apologies exchanged, everyone finally made it in.

Once inside Pam turned to the boys and said "Alright, I don't need you anymore, I just saw where he is." then made her way down to Castiel's room.

"Why do you think she needs one of the angels?"

"Don't know Sammy, but if she were in trouble she would've told us so there's no reason to worry." confirmed Dean with a pat on the shoulder to Sam.

**—— Meanwhile, at the Legion of Dorky Little Guys ——**  
_Knock knock, nickety knock nick knock!_  
Confused as to why someone would knock on his door when the Bunker has an open door policy, Castiel goes to investigate in case someone needs help carrying something in. He too is shocked, however, when he sees Pamela Barnes on the other side and quickly walking in without waiting for permission that Castiel would've given anyway.

"P-Pamela, how nice to see you, how have your eyes been?" Cas asked timidly, unsure of how friendly Pamela is feeling towards him after the incident.

"I can see even better than I did before, thanks for getting that Archangel to fix them."

"Of course, and again, I truly am sorry." recited Cas still fidgeting with his trench coat ties.

Pam waves the apology off casually. "You were a different angel then, don't worry about it. Now onto the reason I'm here." pause for dramatic effect, plus it's always fun to make Cas squirm, "You need to tell that king-sized Winchester about your undying love for him."

Eyes bugging out Cas stammers "H-How did you uh, know about that?" looking anywhere and nowhere.

Of course Pam gave him a bitchface to rival his beloved. "Sweetie, I know you're relatively new to this whole emotions thing, but you think loudly enough for me to hear back at my humble abode while I'm trying to contact my customers' loved ones."

"I apologize, I'll try and think more quietly in the future." Castiel promised trying to get out of having to wax poetic about Sam's smile, kindness, and inner and outer beauty... to his face.

"Nope, you're telling that boy how you feel and don't try to argue with me."

"But how would I even approached such a topic? We hardly ever see each other throughout the day." and yes, Cas was totally using the puppy eyes on Pam, to which she rolled her eyes and muttered a quick you-guys-are-meant-for-each-other under her breath.

"Well that's the first thing you should do, find things you have in common with Sam."

Cas then went from begging puppy to curious kitten with a tilt of his head. "Sam and I already share many things in common."

"You know that, but does Sam? Honestly Cas, have y'all ever just had some alone time and bonded by doing something together?" Cas went to answer but Pam stopped him by saying "That didn't have to do with a case or betraying someone's trust." to that Cas had no answer.

Taking that as a victory against the angel Pam continued, "good, you do that, I'll be going now. Good luck Castiel." and she was gone.

Leaving a very frightened and pouting Castiel in her wake.

**—— Back with the Samsquatch ——**  
*Time Skip* (It's been four days)

'Okay, something is definitely up with Cas. The guy's been shadowing me for three days now, everywhere I go he's right there, I don't wanna bother him though, but I just wish he'd tell me what he's up to.'

It's true, Cas has been following Sam from when he wakes up to when goes to sleep everyday because Pam said that the way to his heart was to spend time with him. So far Cas has learned other small facts about Sam, like how he takes his coffee, which seat is his favourite when watching T.V., and what he sounds like when he screams about seeing a cockroach. Although, perhaps he should actually speak to Sam while he's observing him, 'that's how people bond right? Oh! Sam is exiting, I should go with him.'

'Just as I thought, here he comes again. Well it's not going to stop me from reading, TO THE LIBRARY!'

Once Castiel realized where Sam is going he gets excited because he loves the library and learning things from the author's perspective.

Seeing this as a chance to speak, he does, "What have you chosen to read today Sam? Is that a book on ritualistic sacrifices?"

Sam, startled that Cas is actually talking and not just for convenience, jumps a little and turns to the angel. "Um, no Cas, actually it's not a book for supernatural research, it's just something by Neil Shusterman."

Intruiged Cas asks "Is that one of the Men of Letters?", laughing Sam answers " No Cas, it's just a book someone wrote for entertainment, when I was little I usually did the research for hunts and never got to read much fiction so I'm making up for it now. Do you want to read one? Usually at least three people die per book with this author so it shouldn't be too boring for you."

Smiling at the profound insight to Sam's life Castiel accepted happily and they spent a good few hours reading in each other's company. Sam's heart swelled at the thought of introducing Cas to something new... much like Dean has done a million and one hundred times, then Sam's heart drops. That's probably it. Cas is trying to get on Sam's good side to ask for Dean's hand in marriage since they're obviously closer and their parents are both dead. Maybe Sam should hopelessly pine after some other angel, Inias seems nice, he's always offering people soup after having grown to love it with his new found free will. Still curious about Cas' intentions, Sam goes in search of Balthazar.

It takes Castiel a few minutes to notice Sam had left and realizes that now would be a good time to go take care of some things...

**—·~ Back to Sammich ~·—**

Sam checked the garage first because sometimes the angels liked to go there and laugh at how slowly the cars go. But instead of any angels Sam found Garth and... Harry? "Um, hey guys." Sam started suspiciously. "Oh, hey Sam how has your day been goin' so far?" replied Garth as earnest as ever. "I'm good, what are y'all doing?" Sam asked while gesturing between the two. "Oh! I'm teachin' Harry here a few hunters tricks." Garth answered easily. "Harry, no offense, but what are you even doing here?" Sam wondered because he doesn't remember ever giving him the address. "Inias invited me, said I should try his soup." Harry answered not at all offended. Looking at Sam curiously, Garth asked "Did you want something Sam?" Remembering why he was here Sam said "yeah actually, do you know where Balthazar is?" "I think he's watching the poker match." "Thanks."

And with that Sam walked towards where they usually play poker already hearing their match play out.

Walking in Sam sees that Bobby is sitting across from Dean and Crowley is seated across from Henry while Balthazar was standing off to the side near Dean and Henry, watching. (Making sure Crowley doesn't cheat)

"Ah, Moose, how nice of you to join us. Where's Angel Bob? I expected him to be following you again." acknowledged Crowley.

"That's actually why I need to talk to Balthazar." Sam answered looking towards the angel.

"Crowley, pay attention to the game" asserted Henry, the oldest Winchester, technically.

"Alright Daddy-o don't get your collar ruffled." Crowley sassed back.

"Why do you call Henry that?" Dean asked, tired of Crowley's nicknames.

"Why don't you boys ever call me Grandpa?" Henry sulked.

"Don't worry about it Not-Moose."

"And why do I have to be 'Not-Moose'?!?"

"Anyway," cut in Balthy, "what was it you wished to speak to me about?" he asked Sam.

"Cas has been acting weird and since you're his best angel friend-" "excuse me, I am his best friend period." "Well, that, maybe you know what he's up to."

Balthazar hummed and then smirked saying "I have a theory but I believe it'd be in everyone's best interest if you asked him yourself."

"I like how you think, Adelscott." Crowley chimed in.

"Ugh!" Sam grunted, "Do any of you at least know where he is?"

It was then that Bobby realized something. "If they're supposed to call you Grandpa does that mean I should call you Dad?" he asked Henry.

"I believe Angel Bob was in the war room with the Cherub." said Crowley before he could feel left out of the Winchester family.

And so, Sam went in search of Castiel.

**——– Something Else Witty ———**

"Yes, and I especially liked the slide."

"The slide was enjoyable, but I preferred the part that you climb."

"Perhaps we could return one day Gadreel?"

"I like very much like that idea Castiel, do you think the others would like to acompany us aswell?" Gadreel asked Castiel but before he could reply Sam intergected.

"Hi Gadreel can Cas and I talk alone for a bit?"

Though slightly confused he didn't see reason to refuse "of course Sam." and Gadreel left the two to whatever was going on.

Castiel was also confused but he trusts Sam so it must not be anything bad.

"You've been following me."

Well, shit.

Now, Cas could easily fly out of here and hope Sam forgets about it but that would be rude, for one thing, and the chances of Sam forgetting about this are very slim so Cas stays put and waits for his doom... Although it probably won't hurt to babble and change the subject right?

"Er-" but right when Cas is about to say something stupid and/or embarrassing Inias comes in.

"Castiel! Sam! the soup is going to be ready soon, would the two of you like some?" he enthused like a hyperactive puppy who thinks he's doing something good and wants his people to be proud of him.

Castiel is the first to respond already walking toward the door, "I would love to sample your food Inias." but the poor fool couldn't even make it to the doorframe when Sam caught him and kept him in place then turned to Inias with his puppy eyes just incase "Inias, that'd be great but could you tell us when it's done 'cause Cas and I have something to talk about, please?"

"Of course Sam!" and he too was gone. Damn Sam and his kindness that get's everyone to like him and caused these emotions in the first place.

Once the door was completely shut and Sam was sure Cas would not try to escape he sighed and just got to the point. "Cas if you want to ask me for Dean's hand in marriage just do it."

–Please wait while the angel figures out just what the heck Sam's talking about –

"Sam I believe the custom is to ask for the parent's blessing and I've already asked Mary while she was enjoying pizza with Death and Tessa." Upon seeing Sam's startled face Cas realized his mistake."Oh don't worry Sam I didn't ask for your hand in marriage yet, I simply asked Mary if she would allow me to pursue a relationship with you." When Sam's face continued to be shocked with an added twist of confusion Cas realized the other thing wrong with his statement.

All Sam could do was at least try to see if he'd heard correctly.

Meanwhile Cas was deciding that it was now or never so he may as well sell himself. "You see Sam we have a fairly good amount of qualities in common and it would interest you to notice that when I die I come back so we wouldn't be affected by the tendancy for your relationships to end in death and we already live together so that would be convenient for you aswell, if you get angry with me I could literally read your mind to see what I did wrong and how I could make it up to you" by this point Cas looking at his shoe and wiggling the toe inside instead of looking at Sam while speaking and his little speech started going off course when he began go lose confidence. "While I was speaking to Mary of this matter I thought that perhaps we could get a bee sanctuary since Inias is always looking for new ways to prepare his soup and I myself like bees also. Most likely everyone would find use in the bee sanctuary, it's important to keep them safe since they are dwindling in numbers-"

Because Cas was looking at his shoes instead of in front of him, he didn't notice that the whole time he was talking Sam was slowly starting to get closer and smile while watching the adorable angel convince him of getting the bunker a bee sanctuary. Therefore he was unexpectantly cut off from his freaking out by a light kiss from the friendly giant.

Now Cas just had to make sure. "Does that mean you agree to a relationship with me?"

So Sam just grabbed Cas' hand and made their way to the kitchen to try that soup everyone's been waiting for.

**Author's Note:**

> In case you were wondering, my Characters were those seen in this fic and my friend's characters are Gabriel, Alfie, Lucifer, Kevin, Charlie, Ellen, Benny, Meg, Ruby, Bella, Ben, Jody, Krissy, Michael, Abbadon, Claire, Jimmy, and Amelia.


End file.
